Last one out of the Kinjaverse, turn out the lights.
Last one out of the Kinjaverse, turn out the lights.

So, to replace the fuel pump in my pick-up, I first have to remove the entire bed from the frame (Thanks, Chevy!). The bed is secured to the frame with eight 15mm bolts. They're notoriously tough to unscrew because they get all corroded underneath the bed and you really have to crank on them to get them to move.


So far, I have 7 of the 8 bolts removed.

And then this last one is the mother-of-all piece of shit bolts ever created by the global auto industry. Jay-Z is not more of a pain in the ass than this bolt - that's how much of a pain in the ass it is - based on how awkwardly it's positioned and how tight the fucker is stuck in there.


I can move it about 2mm at a time. That's using all of my strength in a single crank. I can give it about 4 or 5 cranks before I have to rest my arms, breathing heavily while laying on the concrete floor of my garage. This is all on my back while rust and dirt rain down on my face with every crank. It takes about 20 of these cranks to turn it a full rotation. These bolts have 20 threads, so it will take me about 400 cranks to get this soul-sucking piece of slag removed.

I've given it probably 250 cranks so far over the last two days.

I fantasize about the moment this creation of Satan comes lose.

What's everyone else doing?


At the suggestion of Saturnalian Adventures, I tried a U-joint:

Illustration for article titled This bolt might kill me. ETA: Triumph!!

Linked it between two extenders and that gave me just enough clearance around the leaf spring to put the wrench in a much better position. Once set, I cranked on that sucka for 20 seconds and it came right loose.

The bolt, forged no doubt from the scrotal folds of the Anti-Christ, has been defeated. And is cordially invited to kiss my black ass.


I want to really thank all of the folks from Whitenoise and Grouthink for their support and helpful suggestions. That was a big one I couldn't have conquered with out all y'all.

Show 'em how we do, NeNe:

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