Spinach between the teeth: The bane of evil geniuses everywhere.

I have a confession. I don't like Mike Meyers. About the only movie he was in that I can tolerate is the original Wayne's World. And it has nothing to do with him. It's the rest of the cast.

I find Meyers to be like Adam Sandler. Always plays the same annoying type of character in the same unfunny movies over and over. Take for example the Goldfinger series of movies. If they had stopped at one, it wouldn't have been so bad.

But instead, we got the same movie several times. I understand Meyers type of comedy is mainly satire. He's mocking the genre in his movies. And I don't have problems with that type of satire. I generally enjoy it. But to be good, it has to be done right. In my opinion, Meyers doesn't do it right. While he does the over the top aspect of satire, I find his jokes and the delivery of those jokes, to be forced. Much of his work on Saturday Night Live was the same. A lot of it felt forced. The jokes didn't flow smoothly from him.

But this is just my opinion. I'm ok if no one agrees with me.

But my personal opinions on Mike Meyers and his movies aren't why you're here today. No, you're here because it's Monday. And you know that on Mondays I like to make something up. Or not. It's Made Up Monday! I'm going to spin a tale, and you get to decide if I'm telling the truth or if I'm lying.

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Government. Nobody really likes their government. No matter who you are, where you live, and what your government is, you will always be able to find something to complain about. The only exceptions might seem fully totalitarian governments. But that's because dissent equals a death sentence. The people of North Korea don't like everything their government does, but they are smart enough to keep their mouths shut. At least, the ones who are alive are smart enough.

Sometimes you'll hear stories about something your government has done. Sometimes these stories are true, and sometimes they aren't. Most of the time, you can tell what's true and what some person who doesn't like the government has made up to spread distrust amongst the people. Take for example 9/11. There is a segment of the population who will believe until the day they die that 9/11 was planned by the Bush administration. And no amount of evidence will ever convince them they are wrong.

Most people, however, will accept the fact that it was an act of terrorism and the government didn't play any role in it.

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But then we have the Tuskegee Experiment. This is where rural African-Americans were told they were receiving free health care, when in actuality they were chosen because they had syphilis. None of the men were told they had syphilis, and none ever received treatments for the disease. The study went from 1932 until 1972. The study was terminated when the public found out about it and congress stepped in with a series of hearings.

The government has, and most likely will, continue to do evil things. And they have, and most likely will continue, to be blamed for evil they had no part in. This is part of the nature of governments. So now is the time when you need to start paying attention. Because it's either truth telling or yarn spinning time.

Cuba was a wonderful vacation paradise. Until those evil communists took over, led by the man with even worse fashion sense than the North Koreans, Fidel Castro. And oh boy did the US freak out. Suddenly we had a communist nation 90 miles from our shores. Why, that was unfair! Russia shouldn't have influence over a nation that close to us. Something must be done!

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So plans were made to go to war with Cuba.

Keep in mind, this has nothing to do with the CIA and their operation that culminated in the Bay Od Pigs incident. That was totally separate and had no bearing on the war I'm talking about. The CIA tried to foment rebellion amongst the people of Cuba. And they tried to have an army of Cubans who had fled Castro invade to take over the country.

No, the war I'm talking about would have been an actual war between the United States and her allies, and Cuba. But the trick was, we didn't want the Soviet Union to join in on Cuba's side. So we had to make it look like Cuba was being an uppity bitch by starting a fight with us, and hoping their protecter the USSR would come save them. But if we did it right, the USSR would stay out of it because they wouldn't want to be associated with the actions of Cuba.

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If you look at the actions of the Soviets in the late 50's and early 60's, you know it would have to have been something terrible to keep the USSR out of the fight. And that's exactly what the US came up with.

The nations top military leaders, the Joint Chiefs of Staff, came up with, and signed off on, a set of plans that would allow the US to justify war with Cuba, but keep the Soviets out of the fight.

First, they wanted the world to think that Cuba hated the US. So they planed to create the appearance of an attack on the base at Guantanamo Bay and make it look like the Cubans did it.

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Second, they planned covert attacks against Jamaica and Trinidad-Tobago designed to look like the Cuban government carried them out. Those island nations were part of the British Commonwealth, and this was all part of the plan to get the world against Cuba and help keep the Soviets out of the fight.

Third, they discussed sabotaging John Glenn's Mercury flight and blaming Cuba. However, security was so tight around the flight that they finally had to settle for blaming Cuba if anything had gone wrong.

Finally, they planned on bribing an official in Castro's government to command the actual Cuban army to conduct an actual attack on Guantanamo Bay.

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As a result of these actions, the US could justify a war with Cuba, bringing in England at the least as an ally, while having enough justification to keep the Soviets out of it.

So good readers, were these actual plans? Did the US actually have a plan to start a war with Cuba where it would look like Castro started it, or am I playing into your fear that the government will do anything and telling you a lie?

You're going to have to wait until tomorrow morning to find out.