Last one out of the Kinjaverse, turn out the lights.
Last one out of the Kinjaverse, turn out the lights.
This is a platform for User Generated Content. G/O Media assumes no liability for content posted by Kinja users to this platform.

Otters Oddities

Illustration for article titled Otters Oddities

That statement right there is why I don't Facebook.

It's also a very large reason why I avoid certain groups of people. I realize and understand that every person is different, and we all have different likes and dislikes.


Just because I don't like it doesn't mean someone else shouldn't.

However, people over the age of 7 should not dress like super heros and go out in public and behave like they actually are super heros.


I avoid those people. Why? Because they're just slightly delusional. There is no such thing as a super hero.

The people that dress and act like super heros are actually vigilantes. And vigilante justice is not all that different from the original crime.


You may not agree with that statement, but allow me a moment to explain the reasoning behind it. A vigilante has no power under the law. If I steal a purse, that does not give another citizen the right to do anything other than ask me to give it back. If a vigilante chases me down and tackles me, then detains me until the police show up, what they have actually done is assaulted me, and kidnapped me.

Scoff all you want. But it is true. Now, getting the DA to prosecute someone for that is a different story. But by the definition of law, they could be charged and tried for the crimes.


It the same sort of thing you hear where someone breaks into a persons house, and the homeowner shoots them in the leg. The robber sues, and wins. Outrageous, right? Yes. But unless the law states you can shoot a stranger in your home, it's just as illegal to shoot an intruder as it is to shoot someone out in the street. (in some states, you can shoot any stranger as long as they are inside your home. other states require that you make sure they are armed before shooting. And in some, even if they are armed and you do shoot them, if the entrance would is in the back, you'll still go to jail because if the intruder is making the attempt to flee, then you have no right to shoot.)

Another reason I dislike vigilantes is, much of the time, they inadvertently violate some right of the accused. That means the police have zero case against them, and they get off scot-free.


Also, they aren't trained for the job they are doing. They can end up making a situation worse, rather than better.

This is not to say that if you see something going down that you should ignore it. But don't be stupid about it. Don't try to be a hero. Intervene if you safely can, but remember, if you confront the bad guy, you may end up making it worse than it already is. Sometimes the best thing you can do is whip out your phone and catch the perp on tape.

Advertisement did I ever get on this subject? Oh yeah! Because of todays oddities subject. And the subject today involves super heros. Well, two of them, at least.

This is an example of how bad comic book super heros can get when there is a crushing lack of talent in the writing world.


The super heros in question are Superman and Big Barda. I think all of you know who Superman is. But if you're like me, you have no idea of who Big Barda is. Well, she is one of the New Gods who was taken from her mother Big Breeda and sent to 'Granny Goodness Home For Orphaned Youth' where Granny trained her as a warrior in preparation for Big Breda to take command of the Female Fury Battalion.

You followed that, right? No? Fine. Here's a link to her Wiki page. Have fun reading that.


Any how, the subject of today's oddity is what happened when Superman and Big Barda got together in Action Comics #593.

The plot of the story is, a super-villian named Sleeze uses a mind control ray on our two heros.


Here's a question for you: If you had complete control over the two most powerful super heros on the planet, what would you make them do?

I bet it's not what Sleeze had them do.

True to his name, once Sleeze had control over Superman and Big Barda, he did the only sensible thing he could do: He made them film a porn.


Ay-yup.....he had them star in a dirty movie.

And what did Sleeze do with this video once he had shot it? Why, he gave it to his boss, Darkseid, of course. And what did Darkseid do with it?


The only thing the leader of an evil group of super-villians would do; He gave it to Big Bardas husband.

And....I know. This would have made for a great Made Up Monday. 'Oooohhh...Superman made a porn! True or False?' But instead, I decided to just toss it out there for your Thursday morning enjoyment. Seeing how I stiffed you guys yesterday, and all.


*Authors Note*

Don't read too much into my rant about vigilantes. It was only filler. I mean, I stand behind what I wrote, but maybe nit as forcefully as it appeared.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter