Question: What is guaranteed to make both Otter and Sheldon Cooper squeal like a five year old?
Answer: Grabbing our ears and twisting extremely hard.
You thought I was going to say Strawberry Quik, right? Well, it doesn't make me squeal, but as a child I preferred it to soda pop. (Yes, I am old. I called it soda pop.)
Strawberry Quick is something that I will still drink today, sometimes. Although, the stuff they have today just isn't the same as the stuff they had in the 70's. I mean, it's good, but just not the same. Just like Sugar Smacks was a much better cereal then Honey Smacks, even though they are the same cereal.
Also, today, you don't see the powder as much. Now it's either a syrup, or pre-mixed. You can still find the powder, it's just not as prevalent. And the powder is the way to go, if you can. The instructions say to add....some amount. I don't know. I doubt I ever read the instructions. I just add until I think I have enough. And yes, I have had crunchy milk before. But it was delicious, crunchy milk.
So, what does strawberry milk have to do with todays post? Not much. Other than it's pink.
I remember growing up, someone tried to convince me that yak milk was pink. Even as a child, I knew that couldn't be right. Milk is white unless you added something to it, right?
Well, as it turns out, we were both right. But I was righter. More right?
For the first day or two after a yak gives birth, it's milk is indeed pink. This pink milk is called 'Beastings', and is pink because the milk has been contaminated with blood. After the first couple of days, it returns to it's normal white color.
And then, one day, I learned about an animal that does, in fact, produce pink milk. Actual pink milk. Always. And no blood contamination involved.
Some would think it was a Flamingo that produced the pink milk. But, silly thinkers, birds don't produce milk. Also, flamingos are white. They turn pink because of the algae in the water where they feed. Remove them to a different source of food, and they revert back to white.
So, what produces the pink milk? Why, only the most dangerous animal out there! (to humans, at least) This beast kills more people than any other animal every year. You would be well advised to not go anywhere near it in the wild. You will not get away from it, because it can run faster than you. And, it will kill you. It doesn't just hurt you and let you flee.
It's very territorial. If you go anywhere near it's turf, you die. Even if you keep your distance, if it thinks you may be looking at it funny, you will be chased, and killed if caught.
But, don't worry about coming across one randomly. It is, after all, the third largest land animal in the world, only outweighed by elephants and rhinoceroses.
So, have you guessed yet? Do you know what critter I'm talking about? Do you want me to tell you? Should I stop asking questions?
It's the Hippopotamus.
Hippos are nasty. Don't be fooled by the games you played involving famished famished hippos. Hippos are not to be trifled with.
Plus, their milk is pink. How cool is that? It doesn't taste like strawberry, though. I've never tasted it, and I don't know anyone who has. Given the hippos disposition, I'd imagine 'Hippo Milker' is a job they have a hard time filling.
So, hey is a hippos milk pink? It's because of acid, man.....*ahem* Not that kind of acid. The acids involved are Hipposudoric Acid and Norhipposudoric Acid. (surprisingly enough, both derive their name from the hippo)
Hipposudoric Acid is also known as 'Blood Sweat'. That's because it's red. But, it's neither blood, nor sweat. Norhipposudoric Acid is bright orange.
These acids are secreted by the hippo to kill bacterias growing on their skins, and also to act as a sun screen to prevent burning. (all wise gastronomes prefer their hippo medium rare) These acids are secreted through glands, and they also get secreted into the milk to help the production of the acids in the young.
Since the acids are mixed inside the udder, a hippos milk is considered pink, even though it's white until mixed with the acids. But since all milk from a hippo contains the acids....well....science.
If you ever get your hands on some, drink it sparingly. One cup of hippo milk has 500 calories. Which is good for the baby hippo. They only weigh 90 pounds, or so, at birth.
One of the most common pictures we see of hippos is where they are yawning. Some take that to mean they're tired, while others think they are hungry. Really smart people know, however, that a hippos yawn is their way of signaling an imminent attack. So if the hippos yawning, throw someone you don't like in front of you and hope for the best.
Did you learn something today? I sure hope so. And I hope you learned more than the fact that otter likes his milk pink and crunchy.
Seriously, I like my milk pink and crunchy. Also, if you add strawberry quik to regular Cap'n Crunch, it's almost like the original crunch berries.
Also, my sister is the highest ranking librarian in the Hennepin County Library System, so it pisses her off when I say 'liberry'. So she makes it up by calling it 'strawbrary milk'. Otter, and his sister, The Weasel, are both a little weird.