Hoo boy....an Oddities post about a saint? Otters gonna burn......
St. Joseph. Actually, that's not accurate. His actual title is: St. Joseph, Husband of Mary.
Ok, I'm not catholic, so, I'm not into all the saint's and stuff, and I'm not really trying to make fun of him or anything, but, how bad is it when part of a saints name has to include the fact that he was Mary's husband? I suppose 'Husband of Mary' sounds better than, 'Step Dad of Jesus'.
One of the facts most people know about catholics is, they have a lot of saints. It seems that they have a patron saint of everything.
Seriously. Everything. (ok...not literally everything, but, everything in the sense of 'Wtf? There's a saint for that?")
Take Saint Joe up there. Besides the two doves he's holding, he also wears a lot of hat's. (not pictured) Saints, it seems, don't need to focus all their attention on one thing to be the patron saint of it. Our buddy Joe is the patron saint of:
- Social Justice
- Universal Church
As you can see, Saint Joseph is a busy, busy guy. But, there's one other thing he's the patron saint of that I haven't mentioned yet. And, it falls under that 'everything' I was talking about earlier.
Saint Joseph is also the patron saint of Happy Death.
That's right. Not only is he the patron saint of Death, but also of Happy Death. This begs the question of, what exactly is the difference between Death, and Happy Death? Is there really a Happy Death? And, does there need to be a patron saint of it?
And Happy Death isn't the only odd thing there's a saint of. Let's take a look at some of the others:
- Internet (St. Isidore of Seville)
- Poisoning (St. Benedict)
- Difficult Marriages (St. Rita of Casica. Also the saint of Parenthood)
- Advertising (St. Bernadine of Siena. Also the saint of Public Relations)
- Hairdressers (St. Martin de Porres)
- Notaries (St. Luke ans St. Mark. Notaries deserve two?)
- Perfumers (St. Mary Magdalene)
- Venereal Disease (St. Fiacre)
- Knee Problems (St. Roch)
- Toothaches (St. Apollonia)
- Earaches (St. Polycarp)
As you can see, there are saints for everything. Even things that don't really need a patron saint. But, I didn't write this post to mock catholics for having so many saints. I'm just mocking what they are saints of.
Yes yes yes....I do know why they were named saints of what they are saints of. That's not the point of this post. The point is.....Holy Crap On A Cracker, there's a patron saint of VD! (sufferers)