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Otters Oddities

Illustration for article titled Otters Oddities

What the....are you kidding me? Another freaking doll?

For the last two days, I have told you the horror of the doll. Dolls can be scary. Today, I'm wrapping up my doll trilogy with the scariest doll of them all.


Most people think Robert was spooky. Or Annabelle was scary. But this doll? Oh holy sweet Jebus! This is about as scary as it gets. And Otter doesn't scare easily.

This doll is named Bebe Gloton. She is from Spain, and, she should really stay there.


The manufacturer, Berjuan, recommends this doll for girls age 1 month and up. One freaking month! Seriously? You give a one month old baby this doll? Are you a sadist?

So, what is it about Bebe Gloton that makes it so scary?

Well, unlike the previous dolls, it doesn't walk. It doesn't talk. And it doesn't try to kill you. It hasn't inspired a movie. It's a.....doll.


The thing that makes it so scary, let me quote the manufacturer on this:

"Little girls need to learn to breastfeed. Berjuan Toys, the company that has always supported the development of small children by producing interesting, engaging dolls, continues its tradition with the release of this innovative baby doll, The Breast Milk Baby.

The Breast Milk Baby lets young girls express their love and affection in the most natural way possible, just like mommy! The Breast Milk Baby represents a revolution in design by teaching children the nurturing skills they’ll need to raise their own healthy babies. Just put on the fashionable top included with each Breast Milk Baby, bring the baby’s mouth up to the pretty flower, and enjoy the closeness, the loving bond between mother and child."


Yes my kiddies, someone makes a doll that teaches little girls how to breast feed. And the recommend it for girls as young as one month old!

Now, I'm not a prude. I have no problems with women breast feeding. It's perfectly natural, and I think all women should do it. (to a point. If the kid can whip the titty out themselves, they're too old to be breast feeding).


But the manufacturers website features pictures of the doll in action, being played with(?) by what looks to be a six or seven year old girl. And, I'd be willing to bet there's scores of pedobears out there with the pictures in their collections.

I know I've featured some strange inventions before. but this's just.....creepy. That's all I can describe it as. Creepy.


Serious question to all you: Would you purchase this for your child to play with? I honestly want to know.

Anyway, this doll is as scary as dolls get. Well, Baby Shits-A-Lot is pretty scary too, but a doll that actually has can't describe it. I don't want to have to register as a sex offender. Let's just say it's......CREEPY!

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