Last one out of the Kinjaverse, turn out the lights.

An open letter to bad lane splitters

In the state of California, lane splitting is neither legal, nor illegal; it’s just one of those things that law enforcement allows to happen. Let’s call it an unwritten privilege that those of us who choose to ride motorcycles are allowed to take advantage of. I choose to split, and I choose to do it safely.

Like all privileges, if abused, they run the risk of being revoked, so I have to ask; why the hell are there so many asshole riders out there doing their damnedest to ruin things for the rest of us? It’s no secret that traffic in the Bay Area is pure shit most of the time, so as a motorcyclist I’m very thankful for the option of splitting when things back up.


I ride every day as long as it’s not raining, and every day I see a handful of jackasses bombing along the line at ridiculous speeds. If you’re one of these people, I ask, why do you do it? Is your destination so important that you’re willing to risk damage, injury, or even your life? Are you constantly running late? Why don’t you just leave earlier? I always allow myself enough time to account for safe splitting and I always get to work on time. The only thing you assholes jamming down the line at speeds of 50 MPH or more (usually much more) are going to accomplish (in addition to increasing the chances of killing yourself) is building a case for getting the privilege revoked…a surefire way to piss off the majority of California’s motorcycle riding community.

If splitting means so little to you that you’re willing to risk losing it altogether, then stop being a selfish douchebag and quit splitting. Nothing pisses me off more than losing something because of a bunch of self-centered, brainless dickwagons.

At the end of the day, there really isn’t much we safe splitters can do about this supremely stupid behavior, so on behalf of all safe splitters, I call upon law enforcement (most especially CHP) to please do your best to find these people, pull them over, and start handing out stiff citations. We really don’t want our privilege revoked.

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