How dry I am, How dry I am; It's plain to see just why I am; No alcohol in my highball; And that is why, so dry I am...

Before anyone tries to correct me, that's the real lyrics as written by Irving Berlin. The version most of you know was adapted for cartoons to imply drunkenness, so the reference to booze was removed. And that's a fact, Jack! Look it up if you don't believe me.

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And, actually, How dry I am isn't even a song. It's a small part of the song titled 'The Near Future' which Irving Berlin composed in 1919. Although, he pulled the lyric from earlier songs. He probably heard it in 1907 when day laborers sang it.

But that's neither here nor there. Because, really, who listens to Irving Berlin anymore? And how many of you can name one song, (other than 'The Near Future'), that Berlin wrote?

Coming off the long weekend, I'm not really up to much of a preamble today. So let's just jump into Made Up Monday! Troof or Lalalahahahaeyeeees!

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I chose this subject today because of the weather today. And I'm talking about dry. And that's because dry is something I wish it were. Sure, it rained a little this morning, but that's not what I'm talking about. It's the air. I wish the air was dry. Because it's not.

It's humid! The outdoor temp is only in the upper 80's, but the dew point is up in the 70's. That means you can grab the air and bite off a chink and chew it for a snack. Or as the Irish would say, "It's very close today." So, considering how sticky and icky and muggy it is, combined with a record setting June in terms of rainfall, I decided to do a Made Up Monday on dry.

As in, the driest place on the planet.

When people think about dry areas, they think they know the driest. but they don't. I am here to tell you. Or am I? I'll tell you something, but it's up to you to decide if it's true.

There is an area on the Antarctic continent called the Dry Valleys. This area is so dry, (how dry is it?), it's so dry that there is no water there. Or snow. Or ice. In fact, it hasn't rained there in 2,000,000 years.

So forks, true or not? make your guess and I'll enlighten you on the morrow.