Drugs are bad, M'Kay?
Seriously, drugs are bad. Some are worse than others, though. Personally, I smoked my share of weed in high school. And I'll admit, weed isn't as bad for you as alcohol.
I've never done the really hard crap like coke, meth, heroin and such. I had friends who did, and what I saw made me think I'd be better off sticking to the weed.
Which brings me to todays post.
It has to do with drugs. (no really?)
Back in the 80's, there wasn't anything called Viagra. But, there was something called cocaine. And, cocaine was a stimulant. So, certain individuals would partake of some before getting down. (for those who are too young to recognize that turn of phrase, it means 'brown chicken, brown cow')
Snorting was the common way of ingesting it. If you had a 'freaky' partner, she might have been convinced to apply some directly to the source, orally.
Now, remember, this is before crack hit the scene outside of the ghetto. Some people would smoke their coke, but it seemed like a waste. A few adventurous people cooked it in a spooon over a candle to liquify it, then inject it.
Well, in 1987, a 34 year old New York City man, (name was with held from the medical journal for privacy reasons), decided to inject some.
On this particular night, he had found himself some booty. Some exceptional booty, judging by his next actions.
Ad he had done a few times earlier, to get himself prepared for an extended night of freaky naked, sweaty fun, he cooked up some coke and injected it. Right into his urethra. Right through the tip of his penis.
**Authors Note** I've seen some beautiful women in my day. But I'm sorry. I don't care how good looking you are, and no matter what you promise to do to me, I am NOT injecting anything into my penis!
Well, the night went well. I suppose. Details of the encounter have seemed to vanish.
What didn't vanish, however, was his erection. Three days after the liaison, he was still standing at attention. This is a medical condition known as Priapism. (any erection lasting more than 4 hours can be dangerous. If it happens to you, seek medical attention right after you seek a booty call. Why waste it?)
He waddled to the emergency room, and explained the situation to the doctor on call.
The usual cure was attempted. This involved the draining of the blood from the penis. And, draining means exactly what you think it does, fellas. It involves long needles and your penis. Nuff said about that.
Well, in this case, the blood didn't drain out like it should have. The doctors inserted the needle into the penis, but instead of filling the syringe, the blood instead drained inward.
This was a problem. This blood was contaminated with cocaine and bacteria, and now, it was coursing around his body. But, it never entered his blood stream.
Instead, it coagulated under his skin. This, in turn, led to blood clots in his arms, legs, back, chest and genitals. And that in turn led to gangrene in his legs, fingers and penis.
12 days after going to the hospital with the never ending boner, doctors had to amputate both his legs, nine of his fingers and his penis.
So, remember kids, don't do drugs. Or, if you must do drugs, just don't do them in your penis, M'Kay?